New Thoughts

We are interested to hear from anyone who went to one of the meetings recently. Please let us know your thoughts.

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7 Responses to “New Thoughts”

  1. Tim Says:

    There’s been alot of this kind of thing lately, so here goes:
    I was sorting through the usual useful throwaways that you find all over and a young woman approached, friendly at first,
    what was I doing? was I one of those freegans? what is shopaphobia?
    all the usual questions. Then she started asking me if I was on the dole and I just laughed because I don’t have any need for money and where did I live and who paid the rent and the utitity bills and what happened if I needed to go to the doctor? And I didn’t like to say I lived with my mother and I don’t know what I’d do if I needed the doctor or hospital – it’s not come up … but she starts laying into me saying I’m pretending to be doing my bit to save the planet when I’m just take take take take take and not putting anything back into society or doing anything useful and did I see wife swap because it was really good and I should get a job and contribute and it would be better if I was on the dole or something for some reason and I didn’t understand and still don’t.
    Can anybody explain? I’ve been attacked before and stared at and that and all I’ve ever been able to say is I don’t have a choice and I’m doing the best I can but we don’t have a choice anyway do we, I mean any of us? I mean we’re stuck with this society whichever way we vote.

  2. Rich Says:

    I’m all set up so I don’t have to go shopping have been for some time but now I don’t think I could even if I wanted to … there’s so much I do over the internet that just carries on – paying bills and repeat orders and even groceries – they tell me what I need(?) and all I have to do is say okay! … and its fine apart from toilet paper, I can’t use that much toilet paper … and a certain monotony of diet which is a drag.
    But if I cancelled the order I’d lose my profile and I don’t think I could start all over. I certainly don’t want to end up going through the bins.
    I’m going to start planting things next year – a friend has offered seeds and cuttings and help, which we all need.

  3. Sharon Says:

    I’d love to hear more stories of how people cope – I don’t know what I’d do without my friends – and there’s people who feel differently about it. I’m not sure what I think any more. Its just a way of life.

  4. Malcolm Says:

    I’ve got to be honest – this all seems a bit out of hand.

    I’m a surgeon. I deal with science. Fact and reason. That is how I am approaching this. Fact and reason.

    For everyone else the problem sounds deeper. For me, I simply cant shop. I get there and I cant do it. The usual symptoms – sweaty palms, short of breath, raise in heartbeat. And I just leave, drop everything and go. I think its the shop itself. I’m fine with the canteen at work, or vending machines. Thats all working normally. Just shops.

    Clearly, there is a mental obstacle to overcome here. I recognise that at least.

    I wonder if the solution for me is some form of CBT (Cognitive behavioural therapy) to disassociate from my fear of shopping. I was hoping to hear from someones experience of this.

    I am concerned by other peoples experiences. The freeganism (that just isn’t how society works) and the reliance on internet. As for growing ones own, that seems extemely useful. I wonder if gardening doesnt almost have therapeutic values.

    I would worry for the individuals attempting to merely cope with the situation. Get help. It is not feasuble to live with this or any other condition. It is just a disease.

  5. Jim Says:

    Well whilst we were at the therapy session we were asked if we felt comfortable to share our story on here so here goes…

    Well its not really that bad in my opinion. I prefer to shop online and would rather not go into shopping malls or supermarkets, I know I have slight anxiety and paranoid issues since my incident, well its not much of an incident really and I personally don’t think I have a problem but my mother really thinks I need to get over what happened and it will help me get back into the real world and stop, as they say “hiding” in my bedroom, which I’m not by the way I just don’t see the point in leaving my hosue unless needed to.

    Well I suppose for everyone to understand my reason for my issues is to realise what happened when I was 17, I woke up with a really bad stomach ache and my bowls felt like they were going to explode, around an hour after waking up my mother had the birds and the bees talk with me and gave me some money to buy condoms, she told me she’d rather know that I was protected then not know at all. So there I was, going to the shop at this point my stomach was really starting to hurt me, I was trying to rush in and out of the supermarket so I could get home and try and get better. The queue at the store was quite long which was not helpful, when I finally got to the front of the queue I bought my condoms and some Cold and Flu tablets, but it was too late, I was sick all over the floor of the supermarket and I also farted, I was so embarrrased I just ran off home and just cried. It was the worse day of my life and now every time I go into a shop, be it a supermarket of a shopping mall I start to feel sick, anxious and also so paranoid that I think the people around me would have seen and remembered what happened to me 3 years a go.

    I actually thought the meeting helped me to actually realise the problem, but now I need to find out how to overcome the problem which I’m not looking forward to.

  6. Rich Says:

    I think I said this before but its extraordinary how different everybody’s experience is – some people seem to welcome their condition. some seem to be able to pick and choose and others really are distressed. I do think that Malcolm’s ideas about Cognitive Behaviour Therapy might help Jim but not me (and certainly not Tim who wouldn’t want to be helped anyway it seems – sorry to put words into your mouth, Tim.)
    It’s amazing reading what everybody has said and helps make me feel
    less weird … well less on my own. I am starting to accept it and deal with it and it doesn’t bother me nearly so much. I know you’ll probably think that’s a bad thing Malcolm but I don’t think being different is a reason to seek help. But for you Jim it’s different. I have no idea why this has happened to me, but you do and I’m sure CBT could help.

  7. Tim Says:

    Thank you for that post Rich – I never expected to agree with you.
    Except I do know why this is happening. Ours is the only response to the way the world is now and Malcolm, maybe things have got to get alot more out of hand before they change. I am sorry to hear about what
    happened to you Jim and what it has done to your confidence but there’s probably alot of stuff going on with you too and you really should talk to
    people to find out who can help (my experiences of CBT have not been good – and there’s maybe alot more to it than going back into a shop) There is nothing sick about rejecting consumerism though but I’ve ranted and raved about that elsewhere on this blog so I’ll let others speak ….

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